No, the change we have all been waiting for has not yet come; but I am still hopeful. Never-the-less, there has been change, whether we wanted it or not, there has been change.
As I often do, this year I sent out Thanksgiving Day cards. I had not bought them last year, after the holiday, which is what I have normally done; so I had to order cards on-line. I did not like buying cards on-line; though I was glad that I could. I ordered special Mayflower stamps, from the post office; and found a cash of harvest themed stickers, which I had purchased last year. Over all, my Thanksgiving cards were mailed without incident; but sitting down to address the cards, forced me to see some of the most obvious changes of this year. My address book needs some serious work, before I begin to work on Christmas cards. A lot of the people in my life have moved, but there have also been a few deaths, all unexpected. Death is the worst change.
I know I have residual sorrow over people I lost last year, which I have not properly grieved, for various reasons. But I am feeling this year’s losses in a special way. Perhaps because they were all terrible surprises; but also because there were no goodbye’s either before or after the people died. It feels like suddenly there are so many names which must be overlooked when thinking of sending out the next batch of holiday cards.
But as I sit to write these words, I am also thinking about all of the close calls this year. There were so many people who were either exposed to covid or thought they had been, but which turned out testing negative. Also too many more who were positive and survived, despite some terrible ordeals. There were quite a few “celebrities” who I learned, after the fact, had also recovered from this evil plague; though I do know that that list contains losses as well.
There have been other changes to relationships, some brought on by all of those moves, others which simply did not hold up under the stresses, of this horrible year; but there have also been a few wonderfully unexpected changes. I have been so pleasantly surprised by the people in my life, who have stepped up to the plate, if you will, to lend a hand, send a surprise, call at the right time, or extend an invitation, when I needed it. There actions have changed our relationships for the better; for which I am grateful.
So many of the changes this memorable year has brought are sorrows, which stand out and cannot be overlooked, regardless of how hard we might try. But as I swing into Christmas overdrive, my happy place, I also remember that I have experienced some lovely moments, which have brought good change.
I am not looking at the world through rose colored glasses; but nor am I willing to say nothing good has come out of 2020. For me, life will always be about relationships; and even though there have been many sad changes; I know there have also been healing, strengthening, and newly discovered depths and reasons to celebrate with quite a few people.
I will have to work on my address book; but not all of the changes will be sad. I wish you a Happy December, despite whatever heartbreaking changes this year has brought you. That is all for now.